Eight things not to say to someone with anxiety…
Eight things not to say to someone with anxiety… Good article from a first hand perspective on how to be helpful, and how be unhelpful to someone living with anxiety.
Emotional Agility
Emotional Agility Here’s a good article from HBR on managing difficult thoughts and emotions.
Debunking Some Myths About Trauma Therapy
Over the years I’ve found that there are some frequent misconceptions among clients seeking treatment for trauma. Based on outdated ideas of trauma therapy and a misunderstanding of the process, any one of the following beliefs could be enough to keep an individual from seeking treatment for trauma. So I want to challenge them here. …
Some Qualities of Secure Functioning Relationships
Having a secure functioning relationship can be one of the most satisfying aspects of our lives. When we’re in a secure functioning relationship we feel understood, loved, and protected. We feel sheltered from the storm and know that there is at least one other person in the world who knows us better than anyone else, …
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Our Nifty Brains, One of their Shortcomings, and Bears
Many of the people who seek treatment with me have a history of trauma. For some, it’s what we in the therapy biz call “big T” traumas, such as physical, sexual, or emotional abuse in childhood or recent life threatening injury. For others, it’s what we refer to as a “little t” traumas, such as …
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Holding the Hope
Some people seeking therapy are just feeling a little stuck, or looking for more direction and clarity in their lives, while others come in feeling discouraged, defeated, and hopeless. People in this second category want help but often fear that they are beyond help. Those lost in the black hole of depression sometimes feel there’s …
Hey! Watch Out for that Big Pile of Dog Poop!
Like most things worth our effort, therapy is hard. It’s hard in the way that running a marathon, birthing a baby, cooking a seven-course dinner, or climbing a mountain is hard. At various points in the process it is thrilling, frustrating, overwhelming, and discouraging, and sometimes all at once. It is also eventually quite gratifying. …
Sharer of Joy: Nataly Kogan at TEDxBoston
Sharer of Joy: Nataly Kogan at TEDxBoston This is some nifty stuff, and evidence that happiness is not necessarily all that hard to catch, and it is, in fact “catching.” Nataly Kogan is the co-founder and CEO of happier.com. In her TEDx Talk she briefly covers some of the research about happiness, and notes that …
Beginner’s Mind
An important lesson for me as a therapist has been learning to be comfortable with what I don’t know. This means not always having the answers, even when someone expects me to. It also means accepting that sometimes there just aren’t any answers and some things can’t be fixed. At times this has been a …